Halloween is a week away and we are decorating our homes for this fun holiday of spooks and goblins. Now that my kids are older (sigh..) I am no longer out trick or treating around the neighborhood, but my husband and I do enjoy renting a “campy” spooky movie and munching on baked pumpkin seeds while a few little ones ring our doorbell to trick or treat.
While this is a fun holiday, it is not much fun if fear is keeping us from sleeping at night or holding us back in life…
This morning, I offer a few questions for our journal writing time about fear:
1. What are my biggest fears?
2. If any of them came true, what would really happen to me?
3. What is the worst thing that could possibly happen?
4. Once this (imagined) worst case scenario takes place, what then?
5. What if I could not fail? What would I be doing right now?
6. What if none of these fears came true? (99.9% of what we worry about doesn’t happen).
7. Instead of stewing and brooding about something, what can I do about it? What is one little action step I can take right now to lessen my burden(s)?
Many of our fears are tissue-paper-thin, and a single courageous step would carry us clear through them. ~Brendan Francis
We often write about being “too nice” here at The Warm Milk Journal. Did you know that being too nice could put you in danger? I found this out when I had the good fortune to chat with Sean Ramey!
Sean Ramey has been studying martial arts for over 28 years. He is currently a 6th Degree Black Belt and has appeared in numerous commercials and movies such as, Winner Takes All and Extreme Force. Most recently he appeared in the fourth season of ABC’s hit show, “The Bachelorette”. In 2009, he was inducted into the U.S.A. Martial Arts Hall of Fame. He owns Kentucky Tae Kwon Do & Fitness Academy, Inc., one of the largest and fastest growing martial arts studios in the US, as stated by United Professionals, one of North Americas largest martial arts consulting companies. He is in the process of releasing a couple books to the public, “D.E.F.E.N.D. A Basic Guide on Self-Defense” and another on Bully Defense for children, both of which will donate 20% of all revenues to the Children of Fallen Soldiers Relief Fund He and his wife and daughter live in the suburbs outside of Louisville, Ky.
I am so glad to have a chance to chat with you.
We all need to get a good night sleep. A big part of getting a good night sleep is feeling safe and secure. I understand you have a martial arts school?
Yes, Debra, I founded Kentucky Tae Kwon Do & Fitness Academy, Inc in 1998, and it has grown to over 350 families that are actively involved. We offer classes for students as young as 4 and have students as young as 70 years of age! The Academy is a world class facility with over 5,000 square feet, complete with dressing rooms, viewing mezzanine for families, and a kids play room. The Academy was rated as one of the fastest growing martial arts schools and in the TOP 50 Martial Arts Schools, by United Professionals,one of North America’s largest martial arts consulting firms.
That sounds great! My husband is a martial arts instructor too and I really respect what you guys are about…
Yes, it’s a way of life…
Here at The Warm Milk Journal, we deal with anxiety issues and getting a good night sleep. Some of my readers have been victims of abusive spouses or victims of violent crime. What can women do to protect themselves?
Abuse and bullying is truly an epidemic in today’s society, and has been for quite sometime. My best advice for women is to quit being so sympathetic. I always give the example of Ted Bundy, who preyed upon women’s sympathies. I always inform women that their best weapon is awareness. Being Aware alone, can save more lives than any choke hold, punch or kick….combined.
That’s an eye opener for me, Sean. Ted Bundy was a charmer. I could see myself going along and helping him…. So scary! (don’t really want to think about it)! I hope my friends out there are paying attention to this too! We need to get over this too-nice syndrome, don’t we?
Many of my readers are women in their 40s or older. Can older people learn martial arts for the first time?
It is never too late to start learning how to protect yourself and your loved ones! We all stress the importance of reading, writing, and arithmetic but forget to express the importance of life’s most important life skill….Survival.
I am a mom and fifth grade school teacher. At school I use The Second Step violence prevention program and teach lessons from The Bully Free Classroom by Allan Beane. Are you familiar with these programs?
It is wonderful to see schools implementing Bully Free Zones, Bully Buster Programs, etc.. I believe we would all see violence in our schools drop now and in the future, from halting bullying and the effects it has on its victims. It’s a fact that many of these horrific attacks we see at schools have been carried out be those who were bullied at sometime or another.
I hear you have written some books?
Yes. D.E.F.E.N.D. A Basic Guide on Self-Defense will be in bookstores and available in ebook format before Christmas. At Kentucky Tae Kwon Do and Fitness Academy, Inc., I have the wonderful pleasure of touching hundreds of people’s lives by teaching them the self confidence and skills to protect themselves. However, with this book, I have the possibility of touching thousands (and maybe millions) of people in the same way.
Also, 20% of all proceeds from the book will go towards the Children of Fallen Soldiers Relief Fund. The brave men and women of our armed services are the true heroes; they are willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for our safety and freedom. The least that we can do is ensure that their children are taken care of, if they don’t make it back.
These both sound great. I can’t wait to get a copy of each…
Thank you, Debra, for allowing me to talk about this project to your readers.
My pleasure, Sean. We all want to be safe, secure, and sleep well. Thank YOU!
Here’s to being safe, taking care of ourselves, and getting a good night sleep tonight and every night. Much thanks to Sean Ramey and all of you!
In order to sleep well at night and keep anxiety to a minimum, it is important to feel safe and secure. What do you need to feel safe?
As I write this evening, what comes to mind is this…
I feel safe when:
1. I have a roof over my head,
2. I have a car that works,
3. I have money in the bank,
4. I am warm and cozy in my bed,
5. My family is nearby,
6. I am in my husband’s arms,
7. My belly is full,
8. My mind is at peace,
9. I know I can take care of myself,
10. The crickets outside are joyfully singing…
All is well with the world and I Am safe!
As the sun goes down and you get closer to bedtime tonight… here are five thoughts to think of when you are ready for the lights to be off and your head to hit the pillow…
I Am safe
All is as it should be
I Am loved
I Am supported
Life works with me
One of the biggest reasons why we don’t get a good night sleep is we are worried or scared about something. It is very difficult to ease into a nice peaceful sleep when we are feeling anxious.
I truly believe that:
The more secure we feel, the better we will sleep at night.
It is okay from time to time to look at the shadows in our lives and face those fears. Are they legitimate fears? If so, it is prudent to take measures to ensure we are safe (put better locks on the door for instance). If on the other hand, they are needless worry, there are tools we can develop to keep worry from robbing us of a good night sleep (meditation, journal writing) etc.
Today’s journal writing session has two questions:
1. What scares me?
2. What gives me a sense of security?
As always, I will begin my entry and then you’re on your own, okay?
What scares me?
1. Sudden loud noises
2. Being in public parking lots or garages at night by myself.
3. When my husband goes into questionable parts of town where he is a landlord.
4. Getting old
5. My children’s future
What gives me a sense of security?
1. Having my husband nearby (he’s a black belt martial arts instructor)
2. Living in a beautiful, safe part of town.
3. Money in the bank.
4. Taking care of myself so I enjoy good health.
5. My Honda Accord which is a sturdy and dependable vehicle.
Your turn, friends!
*Special coming attractions for future posts this week!…
We are going to continue discussing this theme of feeling safe and secure with some special guests that I am very excited to share with you.
I am also excited to share with you soon exclusive interviews I had with each member of the Wyatt family. The Wyatts run a professional firearms training and largest gunsmith facility in the state of Colorado. Their family and business is featured in The Discovery Channel’s popular show American Guns.
I, for one, know nothing about guns and they actually frighten me quite a bit. So it’s been interesting (I learned a lot). Some of our readers here at The Warm Milk Journal have been crime victims (resulting in much anxiety and insomnia) so we will explore this issue further in these conversations.
Even Mew gets in on the action…. so
Soft sleep gently coming to take me into calm dreamy space.
I welcome the rest, the peace that comes
when all is still
all is quiet
just as it should be.
A safe cocoon I’m in
safe and secure
warm and cozy
There are no worries
No tasks or trouble
of any kind.
Only sleep. Drifting floating peace.
For those of us with anxiety issues, we often get little pangs of self doubt, un-ease, worry, or outright panic. For tonight and anytime you are feeling a little afraid, unsure of yourself, or uneasy… here are five affirmations for you…
I AM enough.
I AM safe.
I AM where I am supposed to be right now.
I AM supported.
I AM loved.
Here are five powerful affirmations to think and say during meditation and for writing in your journal.
I AM loved now.
I AM loving now.
I AM peace now.
I AM enough now.
I AM safe now.
Tonight, as you lie down to go to sleep,
Debra : )
If feeling a bit restless when it is time to sleep:
repeat something to yourself that brings peace to you.
“I AM safe”
“God Loves me”
“I AM love”
“I AM peace”