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8 ways to take the fuel out of your fears to sleep more soundly at night.
Published February 6, 2012 | 
During times in my life when I have struggled with insomnia it is usually because I was afraid of something. I would be feeling fears about my health, my finances, my kids, my job, the world’s affairs, what others thought of me, etc.
I feel like I don’t lose sleep that much anymore because of these fears. I may still think about them but I don’t get “stuck” with them like I used to (especially at bedtime).
Here are a few things that have helped me shrink my fears:
1. Read things at bedtime that inspire me and feed me spiritually.
2. Turn off the day (I rarely bring work home anymore for instance)
3. Limit my media exposure. I still like to know what is going on in the world but I don’t consume it like I used to. There are actually mornings when I don’t read the newspaper (at one time in my life that would have been unheard of).
4. Exercise and practice yoga
5. Write in my journal (you will find many ideas here at The Warm Milk Journal).
6. Push my edge regularly. Doing something that is challenging really increases self confidence. Self confident people are less prone to losing sleep at night from fear.
7. Surrounding myself with loving and supportive people. Not feeling alone really helps us to feel more secure and less scared.
8. A hot bath at night is always a good thing to relax your body and mind before bed.
Goodnight relaxed and fearless one.
Debra ; )
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Letting go with Indigo, a simple meditation technique
Published September 10, 2011 | 
Five years ago, I was really working on getting a handle on my anxiety. I learned about meditation which helped me tremendously. Meditation is a wonderful tool to train, focus, and calm your mind.
There are many meditation techniques out there. This morning I would like to share with you one that is very simple to do and has worked very well for me.
I discovered indigo when I began to meditate on the colors of the rainbow: red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet….
I always sensed a greater concentration when I focused on indigo. Perhaps it is because blue has always been my favorite color and indigo is a very rich shade of blue. Some say indigo is a very spiritual and powerful color. At the end of this post I will share some links to sites about indigo if you would like to learn more about it.
My meditation technique is this: Letting Go With Indigo
I will close my eyes and simply visualize the inner deep indigo layer of a fire flame. That is it.
If I am taking a bath I will burn a candle and focus on the flame. In our living room we enjoy lighting candles or using our fireplace too.
Even if you are not near an actual burning flame, this technique works very well.
Recently when I had an uncomfortable medical procedure done, I had the nurse hold my hand and I closed my eyes , breathed, and concentrated on the indigo in a candle flame the entire time. I was surprised when my doctor told me it was over. The dreaded procedure went by much quicker and painless than I had imagined.
The power of indigo! Try this meditation when:
1. You are feeling afraid
2. You are feeling anxious
3. Your mind is overly active
4. You feel disconnected
5. You wish to develop your intuition or need an answer to a question
6. Anytime you want to be calm, focused, and in touch with the divine and your own power.
I find you can reap the benefits by doing this for only a minute or two. It is truly amazing.
Some resources if you want to learn more about indigo:
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Posted in anxiety, Breathing exercise, Depression, Meditations, Self-empowerment, Spirituality, Visualization, worry | 
calming anxiety, calming fear, connecting, developing intuition, fear, focusing the mind, getting answers to questions, indigo, meditation, meditation candle, power of indigo, the Divine, your power | 
Leave a commentSeventeen things to let go of to get a good night sleep
Published September 7, 2011 | 
To get a good night sleep, here are 17 things to let go of as you turn off your light and put your head on your pillow:
1. Let go of any resentment you are feeling. Just let it go!
2. Any hurt feelings you may have. Let it go. You are safe. You are loved. You are enough. If you need to share something with your spouse or partner, do so. Have them listen. They can hold you. Then let it go. If you are feeling hurt by someone who is far away or not with you, consider writing a letter (just the process of writing itself will be healing). You may or may not decide to send it. Write it, let it go, and go to sleep.
3. Anger
4. Worry about what others are thinking of you. None of your business. Let the whole people pleasing thing go. You can’t please them all- never will.
5. Fear. Imagine the worst thing that can happen and the outcome. Then see yourself deal with it. Now, let it go.
6. Worrying about the future. No reality here. It doesn’t exist. Let it go!
7. Fretting and regretting the past. Again, this is not your reality. This is not your life. This is your mind wanting to play with your peace.
Let it go!
8. Your mile long to do list can be a real sleep thief. Before you turn in, Cross off everything except for maybe the 1,2, or 3 most important things on that list. Tell yourself that even if you just do one of those things the next day, you will have a wonderfully successful day and the rest of the items of the list don’t matter or can wait- yep, let them go!!
9. Criticism of others. It is easy to fall into the blame game. Know that we are all trying our best. Putting our energy into wanting to change others is only setting us up for disappointment and insomnia. It won’t do much for our relationships either. If you are tempted to think or say a critical thought about another, imagine them as an innocent five year old child.
10. Criticism of yourself. Don’t spend another tortured night beating yourself up. It is cruel. You don’t deserve it. Give yourself the love and peace you deserve. Let the critical self talk go. Now!
11. Inhibitions. Are you holding yourself back? Consider letting go of the voice that is always telling you “no”. Go to sleep tonight with a smile at the thought of doing things you want to do.
12. Let go of clutter, anything that no longer serves you.
13. Let go of perfectionism
14. Let go of over committing yourself or your family. Your kids don’t have to be involved in every extracurricular activity your community has to offer. You don’t have to bring work home.
15. Let go of needing to be in control all the time
16. Let go of high expectations. This can be exhausting! Let things be as they are. Let them go.
17.Let go of caring too much.
Let it go. Breathe. Let it go. Ahhh… Let it all go… Your life and peace of mind and getting a good night sleep are much more important than any of the nonsense listed above.
Good night.
In peace,
Debra
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Posted in anxiety, Family life, Getting a good night sleep, Happiness, insomnia, Positive living, Self-empowerment, stress, Tips to help insomnia, Visualization, worry | bringing work home, control, criticism, fear, going to bed angry, hurt feelings, letting go for a good night sleep, overcommitting, peace of mind, people pleasing, perfectionism, saying no, to do list, worrying | Leave a commentTen things we all have in common
Published September 4, 2011 | 
We all share these things in common:
1. The desire to express ourselves
2. The need to be accepted for who we are.
3. The need to “cut loose” and not worry about things for a while.
4. We all are doing our best
5. None of us are perfect (and thank goodness, right?)
6. We all have lot’s to offer this world
7. We all want to be loved
8. The desire for good health and a good night sleep
9. We all have our fears and our masks that we wear
10. We all have an opportunity each day to start anew
Have a blessed day, everybody!
Debra
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Be vigilant to keep anxiety away
Published July 3, 2011 | 
To be vigilant: ” alertly watchful especially to avoid danger” (Merriam-Webster)
Even when I am at my happiest and most centered- I am always aware that the monkey mind and anxiety monster are not ever too far away… ready to tickle and tease and taunt me with their utter nonsense!
I must be ever so vigilant to keep these foes at bay.
For general prevention of anxiety and maintenance of an anxiety free state I:
1. Exercise daily
2. Connect with others
3. Spend time outdoors
4. Have some daily down time: on my computer, journal, a good book, a hot bath, a nice glass of wine, good movie with family, etc.
5. Spend time doing tasks that are meaningful to me (such as my writing).
6. Helping others (getting my head out of thinking of myself)
If I do feel an anxiety attack coming on (it does happen), here’s what I do to extinguish it before it catches fire and gets me…
1. Breathe!
2. Talk it aloud with my husband while he just listens and holds me ( I feel affirmed and loved and safe and the anxiety usually dissipates).
3. A brisk walk outside does wonders
4. Jump on my mini-rebounder trampoline to music
5. Stretch and do some yoga
6. pet my cat
7. call my mom
8. Meditate
9. Write down my fears in my journal
10. Put a few drops of Newton homeopathic drops under my tongue. There are two I like: “Blues & Mood Support” and “Stage Fright – Fear” (www.NetwonLabs.net)
I only use these drops if I feel a strong upset or panic attack coming on (thankfully it does not happen very frequently)
Life is too short to let anxiety, over thinking monkey minds, and the resulting insomnia and stress that accompanies them occupy our lives.
Be ever vigilant and you will live a well balanced and happy life and sleep well at night.
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Posted in anxiety, Depression, Getting a good night sleep, Good Health, insomnia, stress | anxiety, fear, homeopathic drops, meditation, monkey mind, panic attacks, stress, vigilant, Yoga | Leave a commentFive affirmations for when you are feeling a little afraid or unsure of yourself.
Published May 11, 2011 | 
For those of us with anxiety issues, we often get little pangs of self doubt, un-ease, worry, or outright panic. For tonight and anytime you are feeling a little afraid, unsure of yourself, or uneasy… here are five affirmations for you…
I AM enough.
I AM safe.
I AM where I am supposed to be right now.
I AM supported.
I AM loved.
In Peace,
Debra
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Posted in Affirmations, Affirmations, anxiety, Depression, Self-empowerment | anxiety, fear, feeling safe, loved, positive affirmations, security, worry | Leave a commentFear
Published February 17, 2011 | 
Oh fear,
When will you loosen your grip on me?
When will ideas and dreams become reality
because action and confidence win over you?
Oh unwanted companion,
lifelong presence
in the fog
and in the light.
You are there when I am not even thinking about you-
do you ever just take a break?
Perhaps you’ll shrink when you
realize
that I mean business: the business of
claiming my life
on terms that suit me
and not others out of misguided duty
to you.
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Posted in anxiety, creative writing, poetry, Self-empowerment | dreams, fear, living in fear, poetry, self confidence | Leave a commentFive prompts for your journal writing this evening
Published November 22, 2010 | 
When you are cozy and in your quiet place tonight, here are five ideas for your journal writing:
- Make a list of things you are afraid of.
- Make a list of times in your life when you just took care of business and kicked some serious you know what!
- Consider this question: is it more important to be happy or to be right?
- If you could ascribe a color to the mood that you are in this very moment, what would it be? Why?
- If you had absolutely no obligations tomorrow how would you spend your day?
Enjoy.
Debra : )
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Posted in Benefits of Journal Writing, Journal Prompts, lists | color, fear, happy, journal writing prompts, mood | Leave a comment“The Key to change is to…let go of fear” ~ Rosanne Cash How do you know you are ready for change?
Published September 17, 2010 | 
How do you know enough is enough and you are ready to make a change?
I will never call myself an expert but I have made some pretty radical changes in my life the last five years or so. I went from being a stay at home mom in Seattle to a full time second grade school teacher living in Jacksonville, Florida. I am no longer married and I drive a Honda Accord instead of a Dodge Caravan. That’s just a few changes I made…
I have to say that I did not stay on the fence very long. When I was ready to make a change I just did it, as crazy as that sounds. Probably if I had thought about what I was doing I may have never done it. So I truly just leapt off the cliff.
Change can happen like that. Napoleon Hill in his classic book, Think And Grow Rich, speaks of “the man who burned bridges” in chapter 2, P. 34. The idea is to have a desire so strong and steadfast that you would be willing to burn all bridges behind you and not leave yourself a possibility of a way to retreat. We are no talking no safety net. Win or perish!
Four years ago when I purchased that one way ticket from Seattle, Washington (leaving my life of fifteen years) to Jacksonville, Florida I did not have a job. I knew that I wanted a job teaching in Florida. That’s really all I knew. Within a week of my landing here in Florida, I had a job teaching. Things just kind of fell into place…
I think if we are so bold as to initiate radical change in our lives, the universe will recognize that and work with us.
If there is any hesitancy or fear on our parts we may never make the change or changes we want to make. We will keep the status quo because the unknown can be scary. We will choose to stay with something we are not happy with for the false premise of “security”: what is known to us, what is comfortable.
A challenge for tonight: If failure was not an option what would you change in your life?
Get out your journals. Meditate. Take a walk. See what surfaces.
The start of this post began with the question: “How do you know enough is enough and you are ready to make a change?”
Some ideas on this:
- You just know.
- You are sick and tired of feeling sick and tired (a quote I am borrowing from my wise boyfriend).
- You have gotten to a point where you feel like you truly have nothing to lose.
- The benefits of facing the scary unknown outweigh staying in your current dead end status.
- Your energy is somewhere else. You know it. If not now, when?
A phrase that was said a lot when I went through a wonderful Lifeworks program here in Jacksonville, Florida has stayed with me:
If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you’ve always got.
Debra : )
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We are afraid but we just do it anyway: a journal writing exercise
Published August 4, 2010 | 
Earlier today I suggested you look at and become more aware of how much fear is controlling your life right now. Please remember this: fear can only have power over you if you let it.
It is very empowering to push through a fear you have and do something in spite of the fear. In your journal tonight, list down some times when you had a fear but overcame it.
For example, my list might look something like this:
- Walked on a bed of burning coals during a Tony Robbins event Fall 2008
- Went back to school to become a teacher after being a stay at home mom for many years.
- Four years ago I left my Seattle home of 15 years , bought a one way ticket to Jacksonville, Florida to create a new life for myself.
- Every day on the job in my classroom facing a whole day with 25 little second graders.
- Putting myself out there whenever I write here at The Warm Milk Journal.
That’s just a few things. Now it’s your turn. Think about things you do in your life in spite of it being scary for you. So, you have fear but you do it anyway!
Write that list down. We will continue this exercise in the next post…
In peace,
Debra : )
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Posted in anxiety, Good Health, Journal Prompts, Self-empowerment | facing fear, fear, journal writing, overcoming obstacles | 2 CommentsAdvertise Here!
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